Dear Aj.

Dear Aj,
I've decided to take a day out of the week to write to you...this way, one day-when you're older we can read back on all of the letters together, and smile.
You are 4 months and 11 days old...yet...i can't even remember as far back-when you were NOT in our lives (only 4 months ago!). Isn't that crazy? I feel like you've been with us all along!!  Every day, you are changing.  Two nights ago (when i got home from work), you actually cried for me.  You were on the bed with Daddy, and i left the room to get something, and you cried. At first, i thought you were just crying for something else, but when i came back in the room---you stopped crying and smiled.  I thought i was crazy, so i did it again---and you cried again!!! My heart melts for you, my sweet baby. The way you look at me...the way you laugh! I don't think anyone thinks it's as adorable as I do. I was the first person to ever make you laugh...and now, you laugh all the time.  Now, you're laughing without being tickled....oh how i LOVE that laugh!!
You have taught me so much baby! Isn't that crazy? You're teaching me so much, yet you don't even know how to talk or communicate with me yet!? You're teaching me to slow down...to STOP, and enjoy the minutes, the hours, the days.  You're the one making me appreciate all the little things, like the days i spend with you. In a few days...it will be the anniversary of the day i found out i was pregnant.  Baby, I was so scared! I don't know how i could be scared of you! You have been the best thing in my life, and i wouldn't change it, ever. As i type this, my eyes are filling up with tears because, I never knew a love like this even existed. It's in my soul, it's in my heart...something i can't even begin to describe.
Let me tell you a little about where you are in life right now: you have not yet rolled over on your own...but you are trying! I am happy about it! I want you to stay this tiny forever! It's a little selfish of me...i know.
A few weeks ago, i was hoping you would outgrow of the "crying" faze (you did a lot of crying between 8-14 weeks) , and thankfully you did. You're such a pleasure now. You don't really cry for anything, unless you are tired or need a diaper change (at least those make sense, you used to cry for NO reason and Mommy was a little stressed out! :( ).
Yesterday was the first day you ate solids (rice cereal)...and to my surprise, you were a PRO! YOU KNEW EXACTLY what to do! It's like, you were born to do it! You opened your mouth! and swallowed. You didn't even make weird faces! You actually LIKED IT! I am being a little selfish, hoping you would continue to breastfeed forever (yes, i am enjoying that time)...but i know you are ready for the next step.
Speaking of breastfeeding--you are NOW more aware of your surroundings....so you actually want to eat and look around, all at the same time. You've started clamping down on me...which has been *quite the experience* to say the least. Thankfully, NO TEETH yet...but i can see you're starting to rub your mouth a lot and chew on EVERYTHING! I am not looking forward to watching you in pain.  I am starting to look at some all natural remedies and things to help you through this time. The thought of you in pain, makes me seriously ill. :(

Anyways Aj, i want you to always know how much i love you...and how happy you make me! Thank you for showing me what true love means.

I love you sweet boy.

Love,
Your Momma

Aj is changing....and i'm a sad mommy! (Ok, maybe a little bit).
The first few weeks after Aj was born---he was a pleasure. The kid woke up, got a diaper change, ate, and fell back to sleep (while he was eating). It was great! I was like "WOW, babies are AWESOME! All they do is eat, poop, and sleep! I can SO DO THIS! I can have 9 babies!!"
Then---things started to change. Around week 7 (a few weeks before i returned to work) Aj started to change. He was fussy. He was not happy. He would CRY when he was hungry. He would CRY when he was tired. He would CRY when he was wet. He would CRY when he was not held. He pretty much Cried the ENTIRE time he was awake...and i couldn't wait until he was sleeping again. The kid would only stop crying when he had a boob in his mouth or when he was asleep. I figured him out though. He liked LOUD white noise, so i would put him to sleep in the bathroom with the fan on. That lasted a few days (I was able to actually eat breakfast and maybe if i was lucky make myself a cup of tea). Then, he was over the whole 'bathroom' scene...and he was back to crying...so i got smart, and i got the vacuum out. It's a similar noise to the fan in the bathroom---except LOUDER....and it worked wonders. I swear.

It's funny, i know. NO one believed me when i said "MY KID LITERALLY FALLS ASLEEP TO THE VACUUM"...so i had to record it!

I started to notice that Aj only had about 45 minutes window, from the time he woke up, to the time he got a diaper change and then ate. Then---he would start all over again.  I thought i was doing something wrong.  Not all babies could possibly CRY as much as Aj. How do Moms do it? WHY DO PEOPLE HAVE CHILDREN!!??!! I was exhausted, and frustrated. I thought there was something wrong with him.  So, i went to my dear friend "google"...and guess what...Aj is 100% normal.  He was just a normal baby, doing Normal baby things---SCREAMING on the top of his lungs when he was tired---WHY DIDN'T SOMEONE TELL ME BABIES CRIED FOR APPARENTLY NO REASON!!!??!!  I started to read...and it made me feel better. Aj was not a psycho...he was actually, quite Normal!

"Learn the signs that mean he's tired.For the first six to eight weeks, most babies aren't able to stay up much longer than two hours at a time. If you wait longer than that to put your baby down, he may be overtired and have trouble falling asleep."

I CAN'T STRESS THIS ENOUGH! YOUR BABY WILL BE OVERTIRED AND WILL HAVE TROUBLE FALLING ASLEEP. LET ME SAY IT AGAIN, YOUR BABY WILL HAVE TROUBLE FALLING ASLEEP AKA---HE WILL SCREAM AT THE TOP OF HIS LUNGS UNTIL YOU ACTUALLY SIT THERE, AND PUT HIM TO SLEEP.

See, here is the thing, babies don't know what tired is. They don't understand the feeling.  I couldn't possibly understand that..."if you're tired, go to sleep"...but their tiny brains don't work like that. He was over stimulated!!  After reading and reading, i decided to try making it work.  I would have Aj up for about 1 hour, stimulate him, talk to him, play with him...then the SECOND i saw a 'sleep sign' (Aka: rubbing eyes, yawn, watery eyes, etc), i would put up the 'white noise' (in this case i upgraded to the static on the radio)...nurse him, and put him down.  And to my surprise, it worked! He would whine for about 2 minutes (different from crying, just kinda whining) and pass out! I couldn't believe it!!
After that, i started to keep a "sleep log". I would write down every feeding, every time he woke and every time he went down for a nap. I wrote EVERYTHING down.  When i returned to work, i had my cousin (his Nanny!;] ) continue.

Every time he was up...after about 1 hour of him being awake, he had to go into his room, with the radio on static....and be placed down.  This worked wonders. I was able to KNOW when (time of day) he was tired....and KNOW when he had enough!  It even kept me organized on how many times he was eating a day.

Now that Aj is 4 months old, he's pretty much on a schedule. He's a complete different baby!!!!  He wakes up around 5:30 am (which is good, since i work and it's his last feeding straight from the 'tap'). He goes back down by 7ish...for about 40 minutes...Up for 2 hours, down for 1...then he's pretty much up for a little while and goes down for his afternoon nap around 3ish....and then a quick nap (sometimes he skips this) right before dinner (around 5:30)..and then he gets his nightly bath and he's in bed at 7:30 PM. He is STILL waking around 12:45/1 AM for a feeding (i'm thinking it's more comfort than actual hunger) and then sleeping until 5:30AM. 
Returning to work is really hard (maybe one of the hardest things i've had to do so far, after becoming a mother), especially if you're bf...but i've managed to make it work.  I would much rather be home with my boy...but it's something i have to do.  I have to write a post about returning to work full time and having an infant...because it's something that i bet lots of you are dreading (like i was).  Any of you returning to work? How many weeks did you have for M/L? 

emergency review---i NEED to share this with anyone who has an infant that doesn't stop crying!!

oh baby!
just thought i'd give a quick review on something that keeps Aj quiet for more than 3 minutes....

and if it keeps Aj quiet/happy for anything LONGER than 1 minute-MOMMY IS a HAPPY camper! I Promise.  I am NOW able to use the bathroom---or start the tea kettle, or maybe even eat an apple in the time he is occuipied in this thing!!! And that my friend---is Mommy problems!

Here it is:
the Fisher-Price-Rainforest-Melodies-Lights-Deluxe!!!
For some reason, Aj LOVES this thing. Now, i do have a little bit of a secret...i didn't buy it, and another secret---my mother in law got it---at a garage sale---for 5$! Yep. Best $5 ever spent!!! It came with all the pieces, and i absolutely love it! I would've even spent FULL price---if i would've known it would keep him quiet for that amount of time!

He sits underneath it...and it has a mode where you need to pull the little links to make the song continue...and all i say is "Aj, pull the string!" and he's getting the hang of it!

Score!

Ok, that was it, that was my BIG REVIEW! Now, if you have a fussy baby (newborn---around 2-5 months old)...and need to keep him busy, for about 3 minutes, so that you are able to, IDK---maybe USE THE BATHROOM---i would say---this is it!! Keep an eye out at your local garage sales/flea markets---maybe you'll be lucky like Me and get it for $5!

Things I didn't use, even after i registered for them.

Morning!! And what a beautiful one it is in NY! Beautiful Sky's and the weather is JUST RIGHT!
I've been thinking of what i want to post for a while now, since i have SO MUCH built up inside my head...with Aj and all...and i know for one, i would like to post my birth story, but like i mentioned before, that is going to be a day I'm ready...to share the most wonderful experience of my life...and i need to really SIT and WRITE...and re-live it.  Bringing Aj into the world has been the best thing that has ever happened to me...and i wouldn't change a second of it. I still can't believe it sometimes, as I'm watching him grow---that he was just in my belly 4 months ago! And here he is, growing, laughing, smiling, coo-ing, kicking...and melting my heart!! I read this quote the other day (i put it on my facebook)

" I knew love before, but I wasn’t responsible for it, I wasn’t instrumental to its existence. Before I became a Mother, love happened to me, I happened to love – but now, I created love from love." ♥ and it's so perfect!!

 

OK, so i wanted to share with you girls THINGS that i didn't use, and think were kinda stupid---and this is all in MY OPINION! I did a lot of research before Aj was born, and lots of these things had 5 stars...but when Aj was born i found myself NOT using them...so here goes!

 

#1-Moby Wrap!

 

When i first got pregnant, i did so much research! I wanted this thing---and i wanted it, BAD. I was so excited to get it in the mail...and i couldn't wait to put Aj in it! WRONG. Aj was a great baby, for the first week...then after that, he would CRY...for no apparent reason. To put this wrap on, you need LOTS of patience...it takes a few minutes---and it's NOT that easy!  And i know I've done the YouTube videos and I've tried every possible way for this to work---but alas...it's a no go for Aj (and I).  It's this GINORMOUS piece of fabric---and I'm small, so it wraps around me a few times---and it's just annoying to put this on---while your baby is screaming on the top of his lungs! I did however get the Baby Bjorn Air---and let me tell you, as heavy as Aj is now (pushing 15 lbs) this thing is still comfortable and EASY to put on!! And not to mention, when he falls asleep in this thing---i can easily slip him out, and put him down in his pack and play, and he doesn't even realize it! SCORE!!!

#2- Pee-Pee TeePee

I don't per say have the same one in the picture above, but i do have one that has a baseball on it...and i received it as a gift at my shower. And although, it is a great idea (i thought so), i realized---it's a complete waste of money($10). First of all, ladies....we are changing a diaper! You are not eating at a fancy restaurant. You want to get IN and GET OUT as SOON AS POSSIBLE -STAT! Don't sit around with his winky all out for 10 minutes (unless of course, you are airing him out due to a rash--then by all means, yes---let him hang out with his wang out). I simply figured this out all by myself. When i remove the diaper, i open it up...see the situation, and make an assessment on how many wipes i will need...then i close him back up (just lay the diaper on top)...then i pull out as many wipes as i feel necessary for the job ahead. Remove the diaper, and wipe---quickly...but thoroughly...then replace with a new fresh diaper, and continue to wipe until you feel it is clean! Then lay the diaper back on. At this time you can squeeze your diaper creme on your finger or open the powder (he's already covered...so if he feels the urge...he will shoot straight into the diaper...and no one gets hurt. Then apply the cream, corn starch(which i think is WAY better than ANY DIAPER CREAM out there!!!), and close him back up! and you're done!  No one has ever died by a little newborn urine anyways! It's clear, and sterile...and please, i'm sure the vomit is WAY WORSE! Now if you insist on getting something...to cover his winky....try a breastpad....they are cheap, and disposable, and i'm sure you'll have plenty stashed away if you plan on bfing.

#3, LOTS OF BOTTLES!

I was determined to breast feed Aj from the second he was born---and i

didn't get my wish that second, but a few hours later...which is totally fine. Unfortunutely, I did have a bunch of bottles at home---and they didn't really work for us. I was pumping and feeding for the first few weeks until i healed (i was EXTREMELY SORE) and despite what all the lactation consultants said, Aj was fine switching between bottle and breast. Unfortunutely, he is having more of those issues NOW as he is getting older. He will ONLY take the Medela bottles (the ones you pump into)...and every once in a while i will try to feed him with the tommee tippee. I am one of those people who HATE having clutter near my kitchen sink, so i try to have as LITTLE as possible (it's not possible to NOT have a drying rack---trust me!).  I wasted plenty of money purchasing really "cool" bottles---aka Dr Browns, .....and i don't use them! The good thing...they actually latch on to the adapters of the medela breast pump, so i'm still able to re-use them when pumping! Make sure when you buy bottles, you buy only 1...and try it. Chances are, the kid will like only 1 brand...and the rest go unused.

#4 Lots of different baby bath/Shampoo/soaps

 

Yes, i know i registered for them...but if i would've known better, maybe i wouldn't have.  My nephew Kevin was born last year around the same time, so i would always smell and LOVE the Johnson and Johnson's baby bedtime bath! SOOOOO Yummy smelling...and i couldn't wait till Aj was born to lather him up! The first few weeks...i started to notice little dry patches and redness on his face and legs. When i took him to the ped they asked me what wash i was using...and i told him...and they told me to change to something a little more mild...such as Dove sensitive or Aveeno...so i did...and i haven't gone back (now i have a bunch of baby soap i'm not using!). There is nothing wrong with Johnson and Johnson, but it just wasn't good for Aj...so my point is...don't go over board with registering and buying lots of baby wash---until they are born---or else you might be left with LOTS of unused baby soap. I did purchase the Dove, but i still get scared to put this near his face and god forbid he got it in his eye....so i've been using the Aveeno Baby Lavender and vanilla and it's JUST as yummy!! Plus, the lotion is really nice and creamy, and i think it leaves him nice and smooth. Now, just because Aveeno worked for me, doesn't mean it will work for you---so i would definitely try some other brands in the sample size first...before you go all out and buy COSTCO size baby soap! lol



and Last but NOT least, #5---NEWBORN DIAPERS.

Aj was born 8 lbs 9 oz. The kid literally wore size 1 diapers from the second we got home. I had about 120 diapers that went unused (thankfully, i have a cousin that had a baby in February, so i was able to re-gift them). I would even say, size 1 is a waste of money! Not to mention, pampers runs small. He is currently in a size 3, and i bet he would fit nice in a 4. So, if you plan on buying diapers, or registering for them---always go from size 2+....and purchase smaller boxes of size newborn and 1.  They grow WAY TOO FASST...and you'll have PLENTY of leftovers. The only good thing---you can save them for a diaper cake for your next baby shower!! ;)

Any of you have things that you felt were unnecessary? Or purchase anything that you THOUGHT would be amazing, and turn out to be kinda-blah!?

I'm a big review person-so i know i did my research-but when baby comes, you realize what you really NEED and what is not so great afterall.



Weekend Recap.

This weekend in photos:

Hope everyone is having a fantastic Monday!
I am finializing some finishing touches for Aj's Baptism on Sunday.......so i'm doing a bit of running around. Can't wait to show you all the finishing touches next week!! ;)

How did you spend YOUR weekend??

My top 5 things to get BEORE the baby arrives:

Wow, who knew i still had a few readers? The comments made me really happy (even though there were only two---i did feel REALLY special when i woke up this morning!).



I will definitely share my birth story---but that is going to be a little while, i will need to gather my thoughts and a box of tissues first. lol. i can't even believe it was 3 1/2 months ago....it feels like just yesterday:(



Anywhos (let me stop thinking about it, because i get really teary eyed)
I definitely want to share with all you new Momma's (or soon to be) out there all the things that i absolutely LOVED and MUST HAVE before baby arrives...and some---not so much.  I'm going to start slow, since we don't have much time together (aj is down for his first nap, so i must hurry)...



#1 on my list for babies born in the middle of the winter: Bundle me

Aj was born on December 15th (I live in NY so it gets pretty COLD out there, and even though this winter wasn't SO BAD, it was definitely on my TOP 5 list) I had registered for the "Bundle me" after reading great reviews online...and let me tell you---BEST INVENTION EVER. THIS HAS TO BE THE # 1 THING THAT I'VE USED EVERY SINGLE DAY...AND IT IS AWESOME! I really loved it!! And i would give it 6 stars if i could. I originally wanted the white one---but i guess they must've been out of stock when it was purchased, so my friend got me the black/grey urban one instead (the main difference between the Urban and the regular bundle me is the material/ the urban has a quilted outer nylon that protects against wind and rain ---which was better since it's technically *waterproof*---AKA---easy to wipe---after i realized how messy babies are (my baby vomits after EVERY FEEDING---and yes, i thought this was an issue, but he's gaining weight and my ped said that it is normal---).


#2 Medela Breast pump

I can't say i know much about other breast pumps, but i can say i used this one, and it's worked for me. I definitely think that if you plan on breast feeding and returning to work (i have so much to say on this topic, but i'll save it for another post) you should invest in a good pump BEFORE your baby arrives.  I say this because since the day he was born, i've been pumping and saving.  If you don't really have much money, i would definitely try to find a used one on craigslist.  Once you understand the concept of the pump, you wont think it's as gross as i originally thought.  The pump itself does not come in contact with any bodily fluids...and all the extra pieces can be purchased separately...and you can  get them on Amazon for a lot cheaper than BabiesRus. I have my original pump, and a good friend of mine gave me her pump she used when she was pumping so i can use it as backup.  I keep one at work, and one at home. Obviously, it would be too expensive if you purchase 2 pumps (they cost $250+), so that is why i say if you must use craigslist (or if someone you know has a used one) to purchase a pump---i highly recommend it.  I have the tote, and i have the backpack. I keep the backpack at work (it's smaller) and i keep the tote near my nightstand (for nightly pumping).  I was traveling back and forth with the backpack at first, but it was just too much---between carrying my lunch, my purse and my pump, i felt like i was going on vacation every single morning!  A pump is a MUST HAVE...and Medela has my vote for the best pump.  If i had to choose between the tote and the backpack, i'd say the tote. The backpack is great---compact and small...but you don't have much room for anything other than the pieces and the bottles...so if you want to consolidate to one bag---it's too small to hold anything else. The tote is nice and roomy-and you can keep a nursing cover, extra batteries, and your wallet...so you wont have to carry your own bag...and it's stylish enough to pass as a purse (it's NO Michael Korrs, but hey!).


#3, LOTS OF WIPES.

Before baby arrived I did a Costco run to get some things for the house. Not sure if all of you have costco's near by---but i signed up to receive coupons in the mail.  You get a coupon book once a month for a few dollars off a bunch of things-nothing serious. That week (week before Aj was born) I did realize that they had the box of HUGGIES wipes that has 1120 wipes for only $25....and on top that off---i had a $5.00 coupon valid for that week (it's still really cheap for $25....online it's $35). I decided to buy...and i'm NOT dissapointed. I just recently finished the last box, and Aj is already 3 1/2 months old. ANd let me tell you---bf babies POOP... A LOT....


As a newborn, he pooped after every feeding. Now, 2 times a day.  These wipes are awesome because they are thick enough for really messy diapers!


#4 Cloth Diapers.

I am not a cloth diaper mom, although sometimes i do wish i was.  I work full time and hubby watches the baby 2 days of the week---so cloth diapers and daddy were not going to work out. I know if i would've been a SAHM i might've gone cloth...but again, i'm not.
So, here is the thing, my baby vomits. He VOMITS a lot. My mother in law purchased 2 packs of these, and let me tell you---they are awesome!!!! I use them as burp clothes...and i pretty much use the ALL THE TIME...ALL DAY LONG. They wash up nice...and they are so cheap and awesome. Again, 6 stars....if your baby vomits like mine! :)


#5  Last (but by far, definitely NOT LEAST!)  *REST*

Ok, yea, i know you've heard this before..."get lots of sleep before the baby arrives! Once he is here, you'll never sleep again"...yea---well that my friends...IS A FACT.  The first few days he was home---i felt like we were playing house. We didn't mind getting up in the middle of the night. In fact, both of us would get up...and BOTH take care of him-which is awesome. After about 2 weeks...the fun was over! For some reason, it's not so cute anymore! LOL
I was put on bedrest my last week of pregnancy(more on that later), so i was home. I DID NOT WANT TO STAY HOME---EVERYTHING WAS DONE...IT WAS SO ANNOYING. However...that week was nice. I was able to sit in his room, look around---and dream of him. The excitement was just too much...i just wanted to hold him! If you are a working Mama, and you want to work until the last day (like i did), one thing i don't regret was having that last week to myself. It was nice, being alone...and relaxing...i would advise anyone who wants to wait till the last day---to take a few days before the due date...and just---chill out and rest and relax....because your life is about to get ROCKED! :) in a good way,of course.
Hope this list helps you girls! What are your TOP 5??? I'm curious.

It's been a while......5 months or so....and A lot has changed.
For ONE---i am now a Mother of a beautiful baby boy named Aj...and he's already 3 and a half months old! I can't even believe that!! Feels like just yesterday i found out i was pregnant...and now, here i am--a MOM.
SO, i guess this blog is going to do a major turn around---and be all about Aj...but i will try to still keep my theme---since i am STILL learning to be a wife...and juggle that!  I think it's much more challenging to be a newlywed---and a newly-'mom'....and still have a full time job---and all the fun stuff in between.

Any of you guys still read my blog? Any of you pregnant, or have babies since i've been gone??!! Please--leave a comment!

I'm hoping to be BACK at it soon---just give me some time.
I am definitely looking forward to posting about baby items that *I LOVE*...and some that i didn't love so much!

I am a big review person, so i can't wait to share with all of you the things that have carried me through the first 3 months of Aj's life!

so, bare with me.........
and please, leave me some comments!!! :)